still searching for something thats missing

long time never update already.

today - went school early in the morning, had machining technology. my group's turn to use the sheet metal and create a pencil box. very easy to make, but the filing part and cutting part was irritating. my filing skills sucks, and use a snipper to cut metal, it is not easy okay. the instructor cut the metal like paper, i had to put the snipper on the table as support to cut, so he helped me. actually he very good, he helped me do almost the whole thing. thanks! as every week different instructor, the first week instructor talked to me today. he said i seemed like to smile a lot, then asked me if i will angry or not. then he said the second week instructor also say i very smiley (guys gossip?). suddenly a bit of cautious do i look silly smiling all the time. anyway i also got my friends, they always make me smile. anyway after everybody were done, we went for make up lesson. after make up lesson we went for ccn day, a day on which each class set up a stall and sell stuff for charity. when my friends and i went to find our bench, it was not there. there was just a big gap between two other stalls, someone stole our bench! shawn tried calling our care person, he was not reachable. until they decided to go collect the big box of jellys we were going to sell at taufiq's house, i called our care person's office. told him our problem and he said "wait for me, im coming down" yet jessica and i waited quite a while for him. after that i called up the rest to move an empty bench to the nearest space, then the jellys came, everything finally went smoothly. the sales wasnt bad, selling quite fast until we can "buy one get one free". yaungai also came to buy, after that followed him go find weiliang at IT but couldnt find, then went business to find julian. business got winning eleven played in a lecture hall using the protractor, engineering also have. after that went back to my stall as they close shop already. they told me our care person bought the remaining and seperate among us and the cleaners, such a generous guy. :)

24th - my school got one cola drink machine selling drinks, which i learnt can cheat a bottle free. then i showed my friends before how it is done. so darren wanted to buy a drink, i said lets cheat. he rejected. kaisheng also wanted to buy a drink, i said lets cheat again. he rejected too, but after he chose his drink, the lever went down automatically. we all thought the machine cheated him, yet the money was returned. the machine can automatically cheat! so kaisheng said since i want to cheat so much, he gave me the free drink. initially collected my drink only, the lever went down then came back up again, automatically gave back his drink. funny machine. oh we went to eat mac during break, then kaisheng asked me why my nick "game over and restart". he thought i having relationship problem, i then told him having school problem. he quite agreed too, we too slack already and moreover no feel to study whatsoever. then during laboratory i wanted to sleep, he suddenly asked me when was the last time i cried. i just said the day before, my friends looked at me. they all thought relationship problem, kaisheng asked why. i said i told him already what, he said oh and told them school. jasper then said "then nigel should cry everyday" damm funny!

23rd - went to eat with family for dinner. we waited at the zhu chao coffee shop, no waiter nobody serve us whatsoever. 8pm already, so my parents say lets leave. we going already then got people at the stall, the boss said "li kwa la, customer mai jiak liao". before that, he walked past we called him. he promise will be very fast and will got people, in the end still have to wait quite a while. then everybody gone, nobody at sight to serve us.

22nd - watched 9pm x men 3 after my 7pm school with darling. his aunt gave him the preview tix. nice show! got touching part.

21st - shopped with darling, went bishan then suntec then queensway to find his 100+$ nike bag.

20th - met up with benson, ferline, gwyneth, weixiong, zhenquan, konghong, isaac and darling to watch da vinci code. but in the end never watch any movie, everywhere sold out. so decided to spend more on dinner, ate pepper lunch at taka. wasnt bad, i like the butter rice.

16th - after school went home, chatted with kevin online. then met up with him and yaungai for lunch at coffeeshop and talked rot. inhaled much second hand smoke, yikes. around 6pm tuckyong came to find me, then went to bishan to meet up with pastor oon and his friend whom i seem before. chatted a lot of stuffs, and pastor oon treated us eat dinner. thanks!

13th - watched mission impossible 3, not bad. at new cathay, nice place with ushers.

12th - afternoon went weicheng's house with tuckyong to help carry stuffs to the barbeque pit, very heavy. a lot of people went, our d'Den group, church peeps and also weicheng's friends. very happy to see everybody gather, talked a lot. boonkiat and hunghua got drivers' lisences, then they drove me to fetch amylia. i like hunghua's car a lot, its a yellow mini van. with an extra sofa behind, very comfortable. darling also went, but i didnt accompany him much as i said i would. :x then we two talked until 12+am.

what goes up must come down

today i took bus, sitting at the last second seat on the left. suddenly at a turn, there was a crash. i turned back, a lorry's mirrors had hit the edge of the bus. the longer mirror dent in while the smaller round mirror rolled on the ground. but the bus and the lorry just drove normally. kind of tired, i was late then reached school already found so many people walking, late also. then i saw kaisheng on the way, we waited for the lift together then came darren. we went up quite late as the lifts were packed, but lucky the tutorial teacher took attendance at the end of class. lousy i got 3 mistakes over 15 questions for my mathematics quiz, sad no full marks. then after tutorials, skipped lecture and went to library. they suggested buying food to the library room and eat, kind of lame? in the end we went menza canteen ate, then went library after that. we went into a room they suggested, then got some girls came in and said they booked the room. :s so we sat outside. after that went for automation laboratory, so hard! i think i am going to fail that subject. after class went to find yaungai, i thought our usual meeting place is the middle bus stop (my school has three bus stops). my block was at the middle of the last two bus stops, so i walked to the middle one. until yaungai said he was at the last bus stop. he then suggested me take bus to go over his bus stop, so i thought wait until bus 8 then go. he then called again say can just take any bus to his bus stop what, anyway i got bus concession. so i agreed and recklessly took the next bus, which was an express bus! i tapped my card, i was shocked how come got show money instead of Have A Nice Day. then i realised i took an express bus for just one stop, my 38cents flew. i went down the bus and yaungai also thought taking an express bus was weird, so i told him my silliness. it was really express, very fast. after that we went home, then reached home i read my emails.
yesterday i went to visit thomas whose wife had given birth to a baby boy on 9th may. i went there, i could see his eyes and he was looking at me. i told thomas his eyes is like his, very cute. he smiles too! and looking at his long eye line shows that he has big eyes, kawaii~

then his wife's friends and mother came, thomas' parents also came. after visiting hours we had to leave, thomas' parents then asked him to go home eat dinner. he rejected and said he was going to have dinner with me, his mother looked surprised while i was quite embarrassed. so thomas and i had dinner together, met andrew also. and went arcade a while before heading home, updated each other on certain matters. he then offered to walk me home, i rejected and suggested he should go home early. i could sense that his mother a bit "worried", maybe had wrong impressions towards me. though we are good friends, we seldom contact after he has a wife. still, like he said, he is my kor kor always. so i requested for some of the baby photos to be sent to my email, so cute so cute. besides that, thomas also described how the whole delivery went. he was brave enough to stay during the whole procedure. my legs turned soft after hearing what he said, it is so scary can! i told my mother, she also said the same thing. really can go crazy after hearing such things, ha ha. my mother then said she did ask my father to see the delivery two times, he rejected. fancy seeing my father looks so macho and man, he dont dare to see delivery process (teehee).
so anyway, then after checking my emails today. i went downstairs to meet tuckyong to show him some of my past photos he requested. some of the photos got the classics and him, he dying to laugh at himself (ha ha, joking). chatted quite a while then went home eat dinner. my mother and my brother have new handphones now. my mother uses some mickey mouse handphone, then my brother using sony ericsson 3g phone. envy, though my father is still asking me to change handphone. i reject because i am in content. :)

i have lost what i had

yesterday had machine technology lesson. was quite fun, i partnered with the other girl named april. then the instructor asked for my name, he asked is it may. i said no, alicia. girls have more priority than guys for this d&t class, the instructor everytime help us do and guide us all those. :) anyway april didnt follow some rules, lucky mr dominic kan didnt dismiss her. it is like kind of lame to follow so many rules, to make us ugly (lols). no sleeveless shirt, no long sleeve shirt, no rings, no accessories, no loose shirt, must tuck in, must wear tight fit shirt, must tie up hair, must wear hard covered shoes, must wear long jeans, must wear googles. other than looking ugly, the work can be quite interesting. mostly its our instructor demostrate one procedure then let us do, then followed by another procedure and go on. we are going to create a G-clamp with one aluminium block and a bronze rod, and a pencil box with a steel sheet. so each week do one type of material, this week my group started with the aluminium block for the G-clamp. very satisfied with my work, it is all hard work and it turned out well. now i know its quite tough to make a G-clamp, i will appreciate things more. hand made stuffs need a lot of skills you know.

the black part is to be removed, then the thread of the G-clamp i now then know it is done manually. i thought got some machine can screw the thread, but we had to do it manually. after finishing with the body of the G-clamp, my classmates and i had a class photo. quite funny with the mask and googles.

our first class photo i guess. after that went home because very tired. changed bus at payar lebar, saw longhui again. then talked awhile, got a lot of students boarded the bus and blocked our communication path. reached our bus stop already, we went home. tired so slept, at night then had dinner with darling, tuckyong, weixiong, christopher and roxanne. lazy already. :x

live the way you should with your one life

what should i do? im running low.

there is this most boring lecturer. for introduction, he introduced himself by boasting all this oxford certificates to us on slideS. he is very strict, cannot talk at all during his lectures. cannot laugh, cannot turn, cannot whisper, why not include cannot breath. *argh im going to die. today he kept going "dont ask your next door neighbour, ask me!". hey come on, oxford graduate uses such term "next door neighbour"? my neighbour at toa payoh. and why get so worked up if we dont have questions, no questions means teach too well what. he really quite weird also, when using powerpoint he off light, then he need the whiteboard he on light, then he go back powerpoint off light, want write something on whiteboard on light, and it repeated and repeated. i got so tired of what not cannot do, i saw someone at the corner sleeping. so i thought of sleeping too even though i was sitting at the middle. good thing, he didnt say anything. so next time i will sleep often.

i am so tired, seemed late a bit then can sleep. but today i looked at my face, my eye bags so dark! then my parents say now then i realise. morning when the sun shine on my face, i look like vampire. at night i look like zombie, which i totally agreed looking like a dead girl.

on saturday, jane smsed me "you going to yanfang's house later?" i was like blurred nobody mentioned it. so i asked for what and she said to have dinner. so i met kaihong as i wasnt very familiar with the route yet. he then told me the next day was jane's birthday and we were going to celebrate. actually everybody didnt know, so i just offered to pay for what zhansheng have bought for dinner. reached ang mo kio already, jane and her girl friend was in front of us. jane and her friend have a little relationship, moreover her friend didnt know jane is a girl! it is really odd, and they have been together for months the girl still dont know? then we had to pretend and act along that jane is a male, which is quite hard. i dont really call her that often, but yanfang kept "woman" "jane" "she" mistakes mistakes! the girl asked "woman?" then yanfang excused herself by explaining she called everybody "mad woman" just for the fun of it. kind of, lame? other time yanfang will call her "brother" and the rest of them call her "ah wang" adapted from anime. so zhansheng and minghui cooked chilli crab, i starting didnt know. i walked to the kitchen, i saw that they had to kill the crabs, chopping and killing them. my heart was like going to sink can! then yanfang faster pulled me away. then they also cooked soup with mushrooms, potatoes, forgot what else, just very tasty! and also had roasted chicken. i like to eat with them, especially when zhansheng and others cook. it is really heart warming to eat together like a family and tasting all the delicious (even in the heart) food. i dont really eat seafood, and so so long never eat crab already. my brother cook really well, i have to say. then though the girl first time came, she just ate normally and laughed happily along. i like her, not shy very outgoing. she is quite short and chubby, but quite pretty and bubbly. then she is from tp design school, didnt really see her before. after that next day the few of us had to go back yanfang house again, because forget to cut cake. the cake was very delicious, my favourite mango cake but special type of cake. never really seen before, it looked like kuay lapis, but its mango! then the rest went to pasir ris as it was kaihong's last day of work at the x-zone, maybe can get some free stuffs as the boss not around on sundays. and i went to find isaac, tuckyong, weixiong and darling at snookerzone. ate and walked around with boonliang joining us later. yes i feel lousy.

i totally cant wait until the 12th arrive, i want that day to come faster!
anyway here are some bo liao clips.

rubbish





see me the way you know me.